Mohawks, Limos, and Mice, Oh, My!

The Wasden Family! They were seriously the COOLEST and made us the most
delicious dinner and even gave us this apple cider to take home.

 Before coming on a mission, my Mom would often talk about this idea that while serving as a full time missionary, you experience something called, "The Pendulum Effect." The further the pendulum swings back toward discouragement, opposition, frustration, and sorrow -- the more momentum is provided to swing the opposite way for our learning, growth, strength, and joy. The more intensely it goes toward one way, the greater the reward and joy in comparison. This idea came to mind while trying to think about what to write to everyone this week. So many things have happened this week, but there were some extremes that I would like to focus on.

I figured it would be best to begin with the not-so-good times, so then the great times seem even better.

At the beginning of this week, I had a very interesting experience. I have been trying to decide if I should even write about it, but I feel like often times in these missionary group emails we tend to only talk about the miracles and blessings we experience as missionaries. So, here goes nothing. I had a couple of days where I felt as though I had lost all sense of motivation. I wasn't enjoying the work as much as I normally do, my mind kept coming up with excuses to not do the things which I know I should be doing, and I was really struggling to have a desire do anything or talk to anyone. It felt as though I had this almost tangible sense of darkness come over me. I know that sounds really dramatic, but that's the only way I can think to describe it. I guess spending all day telling everyone you come into contact with that "this is what I believe" and have them sometimes challenge you makes you sometimes wonder....IS this what I believe? Am I just wasting my time out here, is any of this even true? I suppose you could say that I had a minor crisis of faith.

Sister Phillips could tell that something was off and I wasn't my usual self, and so she asked me about it. One night I talked to her about it and she let me have a moment to myself. So, I just let it all out. I started praying and literally just sobbing. I honestly don't know what came over me, but I literally couldn't stop. All my frustrations that I had bottled up were literally spewing out as tears streamed down my face, and I couldn't catch my breath. Suddenly, I felt something literally sweep over me and within seconds I caught my breath and stopped crying. Everything felt still and silent, and I just sat there for a moment, unsure what had just happened. I closed my eyed, pulled out my scriptures, and opened up to a random spot. It was Alma 5:60, and it says, "And now I say unto you that the good shepherd doth call after you; and if you will hearken unto his voice he will bring you into his fold, and ye are his sheep; and he commandeth you that ye suffer no ravenous wolf to enter among you, that ye may not be destroyed." 

Interpret the scripture however you would like, but I think that it was exactly what I needed to hear. That "ravenous wolf" that had come into my heart and made me feel these things, these doubts and feelings of uncertainty, those feelings naturally disappear IF I hearken unto the voice of the good shepherd. That verse is exactly what I needed to hear.

After this happened, the next day we went knocking. It was honestly a little draining, but we did our best to keep it fun. We were getting toward the end of the night, and said that we would knock one more door and then we would leave. We knocked, no one answered....but as we were standing there this girl comes up to go into her apartment that is right next to the door we just knocked. She had just gotten off of work at UPS, we talk to her for a little while. We show her the "Because of Him" video, and you can see that tears are starting to form in her eyes. After the video finished, she just said, "Wow, that was beautiful, thank you. I really needed to hear all that." She said that she really wanted to meet with us again, and that she is going through a really difficult time right now. So, that was a really big tender mercy for us to have been there to meet Nisha and share something that helped her.

Since that experience, I have been doing a lot better and have gone back to enjoying life as a missionary, and looking forward to the challenges which come. I have learned that sometimes you need to have moments like that, just to strengthen the knowledge and testimony which you DO have. Unless you are actively trying to make it grow, you begin to be passive and grow unsure. Always be working to strengthen your faith.

Judith!! She looked so beautiful and was so excited that we got to be a part of her special day.

Ralph!! This was his "smolder". He kills me, oh man

Now, onto the fun stuff. THE WEDDING. BEING A BRIDESMAID. RIDING IN A LIMO. WALKING DOWN THE AISLE LINKING ARMS WITH A BOY (scandalous, I know). Never in a million years would I ever think that I would write about any of these things in a weekly email home, and yet, here I am. For any of you who have forgotten, Sister Phillips and I have been teaching a man named Ralph, who is the now HUSBAND of Judith, a member of our ward. Since being here, they have basically become my second mom and dad.  They are the kindest, most loving people I have ever met. And Ralph has been wanting to be baptized for a while, but because they were living together, they first had to get married before he could be baptized. So we helped Judith with the wedding a little bit and she asked us to be bridesmaids. The whole day felt like a dream!!

Us and all the kiddos! They were absolutely crazy but we
loved helping them get into their spots for the wedding haha

 

Limo ride with the cool teens. Yiikes, I can't believe I just said that

There were so many members who came up to us after the event and told us that we were their favorite part of the whole thing. "Seeing you two girls walk down the aisle with your name tags and cute modest dresses, that was so awesome!! We were so excited when we saw you!" Haha. So, not very many people can say that while on their mission they were a bridesmaid, and danced down the red carpet to "Celebrate Good Times," so I feel pretty special. Anyway, it was a fantastic night, but I will stop talking about it now lol.


I am absolutely loving life in Maplewood. I finally feel like I am a part of the ward, I finally sorta know what I am doing, and I am feeling a lot more confident with my teaching and ability to talk to people. Things are just falling into place and I am beginning to really find JOY in the work. I know that I was sent to New Jersey for a reason, and I know that my Heavenly Father is aware of me and loves me. There is so many more things to write about, but I will leave you all with some stories.

Last coordination meeting with Brother Frimpong!
We got a new ward mission leader this week, will keep you updated on how he is.

 

Rob! He is the coolest and always invites us to his band's shows even though we can't go. Bless his heart!

Funny stories of the week:

- Sister Phillips gave me a map of our entire area which we cover, and had me go into another room and pray to know where we should go, like the exact street. I was looking over the map a little bit after I prayed, and "Mohawk Street" stuck out to me. But I just figured, that it was probably because that is an awesome street name. So I kind of disregarded it, and kept looking around. Finally, I closed my eyes, moved my finger around the map, and stopped. My finger was literally RIGHT ON TOP of Mohawk Street. So, we decided to go there later that night. Turns out, Mohawk Street is one of those awkward connector roads that don't have any houses on them. Well actually, it had ONE house on it, and a dilapidated old shack across the street. We were laughing so hard. So, we knock on the one lonely house on Mohawk Street. No one answers. We can literally HEAR that there are people inside, and I was getting so sad. I just wanted to scream, "God sent us to you!!! Open up!!" but sadly, I didn't. We left a card with a note on it, but we will see if anything comes from it. Sigh.

My ridiculous note that I wrote to the people of Mohawk Street. I am still so sad about that.
And sorry I had to white out our number, I know you all are just dying to call us lol

- The two sisters who were in the Maplewood area before us had both gone home at the same time, so Sister Phillips and I were "doubled in" to the area. The sisters before us left a bunch of notes and tips about the area, and one of these notes was about Harvey, their mouse roommate who they would see occasionally. The entire time we have lived here we haven't seen him, so we both figured he had died or scurried off somewhere. But no, he was just looming, waiting, preparing to strike. Last night I was walking toward the room to change into my pajamas and I see this gray blob moving around on the floor. It zooms past under my legs and I realize what (or who) it is and start screaming bloody murder. Sister Phillips turns around and sees Harvey and literally JUMPS on top of her desk. It was the most stereotypical "two girls find a mouse in their apartment" reaction I had ever seen. So now, we don't know where he went, and we are afraid in our own home. Send help.

Well, sorry this is such a marathon email. To all of those who actually read these things, I love you and I thank you for the support. You all mean the world to me, and I hope that all is well.

Love,
Sister Yocum